Finding Yourself

I was listening to John Bradshaw yesterday. If you don't know him, no worries, he popularized the idea that certain dysfunctions stem from a need to heal our "inner child". In one of his books –Healing the Shame that Binds You- he states;

Unhealthy toxic shame, often learned young and maintained into adulthood, is the core component in our compulsions, co-dependencies, addictions and drive to super-achieve.

As we prepare for another four week series on the Wholehearted Men Show, we're going to look at these issues and impact on self. In the last eight weeks -on the Wholehearted Men Show- we've covered relationship or lack thereof with fathers. We've looked at the intricacies of vulnerability in men, and had guests provide cogent advice on how to break this shell.

Some of the key messaging we've heard is;

Develop a circle of trust with people you can be vulnerable with. Make a habit of regular connection.

Every man needs to believe in a higher power, something greater than himself.

Be authentic. Show up as yourself and enjoy your own process.

Most of us have an easier time connecting outside of ourselves. We often like or treat people better than we treat ourselves. The desire for external validation, propels the behavior. To develop resilience and a strong self identity, we must seek ourselves intimately. We have to study our needs for nurturing and place ourselves in the best position to find them within ourselves. We need to embark on a journey of self-discovery.